Alas...

So I walked home from the gas station last night after stopping at the grocery store. It was quite awful. I was not sure I could keep my lunch in, and the smells and everything in the store were overwhelming. So as I walked, I repeated in my head, “Voy a vomitar! Cuidado!” (I’m going to vomit! Watch out!) This was what I was going to tell anyone who tried to mess with me, though it is really quite safe for me to be walking around by myself. Having just watched “What the Bleep Do We Know?” a couple days earlier, I remembered I needed to be talking good about myself. I changed my mantra to “I’m healthy and strong.” It worked for a while. I made it back to the farm and got myself ready for bed…and then I vomited. I felt so much better after that, but it meant today was another day in bed. No food! All I wanted was to eat something tasty and keep it in my belly! It was a much more difficult day. I couldn’t help but cry. Everyone else got to work, well almost. Myrna had a horrible fever. Something is cruising through us. Tatiana was very sweet and made me some capsules of oils to help my stomach. It seemed to help, and I had some flavor in my mouth at least. Lunch was homemade tortillas (omelets), and I saw lots of strawberries. I wanted to be a part of everything. Staying in bed is BORING!! I was a little relieved to miss the discussion of cleaning and the creation of a chore list, but I cried in bed anyways because I wanted to eat strawberries. I cried because I came to work and was missing my third day of work. Meditation and my mantra helped. Reading “Tuck Everlasting” was consoling. For dinner I got to make myself some broth with celery leaves, onions, and carrots. It was great. Everyone teased me, but it was salty and good. I plan to work tomorrow. There is just no way I can spend another day in that bed! I am healthy and strong!!! tori