What a long strange trip it's been...

How lucky for us to have a whole week in Oregon!  I am tired, yet I am sad to leave, too.  It has been such an exciting trip seeing family, playing games, indulging in wonderful meals, enjoying both the beach and the mountains!  Alas, I am also looking forward to the quiet, gentle pace of home.  (We sat in some nasty traffic in downtown Portland today that inspires a place with less cars and people!)

 

It truly has been a blessing to be here, though at every chance I have had, I check back to www.ourlittlehippie.com to see how little Liam and his family are doing.  My family has all been praying for and asking about him.  Today, too, we remember, and not without tears, the death of one of my sister's best friends...seven years!  It can still feel so raw as if it were yesterday. 

 

But how fortunate to be present to and celebrate life right here..  I got to meet little Benjamin Dieringer, three months old on Saturday and son of Pat and Amy.  And Cole, my nephew already a year now, entertained us thoroughly up at the Bear Hut.  He has a great way of laughing at just the right time, as if he understands that what someone has said is really funny or sarcastic.  I just don't know any babies back home, just adults who sometimes behave like one (ooh...who you think I am talking about?  This one will definitely get me in trouble). 

 

So tired right now, I really need to hop in the shower and get some zzzzs before our 6 AM flight.  Phew...if it wasn't so rainy, I would think that I could at least see the sunrise!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!  I am blessed.  I am truly and thoroughly blessed.  

 

Tonight I am a little heartbroken.  My girlfriend Ahna and her husband Oren (our wedding photographer) have received terrible news that their baby born on Sunday has suffered severe damage to large parts of his brain.  All our prayers and hopes have been with them as they waited for the results of a brain scan yesterday, which medically speaking has removed all hope for any recovery from the loss of oxygen.  It is devastating for them and for us, and while I remain hopeful and prayerful that God be present and comforting, it is tragically not the story of hope one imagines at the birth of a child.  It challenges faith for many and leaves those of us clinging to faith confused as to what we should hope for them.  

 

I share this story because I believe in the power of prayer and hope you will lift your voice in prayer for them, too.  I pray that God gives them the strength and courage to be their best selves, to cherish and love their 2 year old, to care for each other as they grieve in their own ways, and to mother and father Liam the best way they can.  May God hold them closely, and may they feel God's comforting presence in these days...

 

(www.ourlittlehippie.com for pics of Liam)

Catch up...

I am tired and sleepy from all the fun...

 

So Sunday morning after a sleepless night, I got up early for Confirmation class and a few extra hours of work to make up for taking a snow day the Friday before.  I was hoping to get home sooner than later, as Thomas and I were packing and readying ourselves to drive Monday to Denver to fly out to Portland.  Everything came together just fine, and though we stayed up later than I would have liked, we embarked on our Christmas vacation about 10:15 am on Monday. 

 

We talked and talked on the drive.  Gratefully Thomas did all the driving.  He said I could sleep, but there wasn't much chance of that.  The wind was brutal.  We were grateful there was no snow in the forecast for our drive, but there were high wind advisories.  At one point in southern Colorado, we saw the semi trucks, a few campers, and trucks with trailers pulled off on the exit ramps and under the overpass tacking shelter from the wind.  We kept navigating our way north, taking a beating from the wind and appreciating all the extra pounds of recycling materials I had boxed in the bed of the truck adding some extra weight.  Out of nowhere we saw a semi on its side!  It was southbound and had rolled into the grassy median.  The driver side of the windshield had been broken out.  Further north we saw another semi on its side and a trailer on its side without the truck cab.  It was THAT windy!  Scary!

 

I was pretty paranoid about missing our flight due to long waits for parking, checking luggage, and security.  We probably could have been more social before we left, but I was pressuring Thomas not to underestimate the power of chaos at DIA.  We were extraordinarily early, found parking and a shuttle quickly, walked into a nearly empty airport and checked our luggage without having to wait, and buzzed through security with no hiccups.  Good thing we stopped at the bookstore in Pueblo for reading materials!  We left half an hour late from DIA because of delayed connecting flights for other passengers.  It made for a long day, and we were pooped despite sleeping in on Tuesday morning.

 

After a fantastic family dinner on Tuesday night, Thomas and I repacked our bags for a mini-vacation in a vacation.  Wednesday morning we left for a suite at the Oregon Coast!  We enjoyed sightseeing along the way (mostly seeing the Spruce Goose), ate delicious seafood, drank great local beer, hot-tubbed, walked on the beach and collected rocks, enjoyed our ocean view in front of the fireplace in the room, and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. 

 

So here it is Thursday night, and we are tired.  Thomas is working with Dad and Marty on a batch of Porter...boys brewing beer, what fun!  I wrapped a few presents and am dreaming of my pillow.  Away I go...

We made it!

Wow!  Nobody called Miami to say two of its residents arrived in Oregon safely.  Can't wait for the trouble when we get home!

 

Thomas and I are in Oregon, officially.  It has been six months, a record for me in about ten years.  I used to travel home every three to four months, but this time we skipped the warm months and went from rainy June to rainy December.

 

We're headed back to the beach to a spot we enjoyed on our drive up the coast before our wedding.  Our rain jackets are packed, and this time we are driving down in a truck that we won't be sleeping in...what a splurge!  Can't wait for cold sand between my toes...

Thinking of a special little boy....

Last night I couldn't sleep, and I had to wonder who else might be awake...I had been so tired, but I lay in bed awake for a few hours.  I wonder when things like this happen about what is happening to whom where, and what prayers are needed.  Little did I know that my dear friends Ahna and Oren had made it to the hospital to deliver Liam Andreas Bersagel-Briese.  There were some complications, and they are all in need of some prayers.  Thomas and I hope to make it to the hospital to visit Ahna, but don't know if we can also make it to Children's Hospital to see little Liam in NICU. 

Please keep Liam and his mom and dad, his big brother and all the family in your prayers.  (his story is at ourlittlehippie.com)

Social skills....

Today was a full day.  Up early, I left Miami a crisp morning with a sky full of clouds.  An hour later the snow was coming down hard in Miami, so I was told.  I had much to do, but all the same, I called Marie during her usual morning break to ask her if she would check on me before heading home, just in case little Pita and I were snowed in.

The snow flurried gently in Cimarron in the morning, but didn't accumulate or stick (nor did it accumulate or stick in Miami).  The forecast of moisture up to three inches did not materialize, and I was able to drive myself home.

Ordinarily (as in the past few times out of almost half a dozen), I watch the clock on a first and third Thursday, so I don't miss FireHall - how I refer to meetings at the fire hall.  The first Thursday is business meeting for all fire fighters and Ladies Auxiliary, and the third Thursday is a training meeting for the fire fighters.  This particular third Thursday was our social skills training.  It isn't something you can learn driving the truck or operating the pump, so we all brought food to the training and held it in a more sociable setting, the McBraer home.  We also brought adult beverages to help unwind from the day's work and help practice being social.  It was a very good training.  There were many tasty treats, including a delicious spinach veggie dip that Thomas made.  I think everyone is feeling more confident in their social skills, so next month we can probably get back to truck driving or other pertinent training for fire fighters.

I am feeling especially exhausted and look forward to getting close to my last day of work before vacation.  (I teach confirmation on Sunday, so I won't be quite finished until Sunday.)

No, I was not drunk....but I wish I was numb...

This morning I headed off early to make sure I had time to check in at the office before heading to the hall. To have seen my driving, you would have thought that I had a pint of something cheap in a paper bag with my pumpkin empanada for breakfast. I hadn't. And I hadn't consumed any alcohol at all on Tuesday to have left me hungover or anything. The wind was gusting faster than I was driving...still is. The winds coming out of the west and southwest are blowing so fiercely today. You can hear them whistle around the windows, and even the water in the toilet bowl sloshes from side to side from the air in the vent pipe. As soon as I got to the hall, the power started flickering...never a good sign at the start of the day, though it stayed on most of the day. I met many more people in town today, but not under great circumstances. The community rallied and pulled together at the last minute for a funeral luncheon this morning. More people brought food than attended the services or luncheon, and I can only imagine the piles and piles of leftovers. We got the call on Friday that a two month old died. The parents, terribly young, just moved to Cimarron from California. Her father is here, but they know nobody and have no support network here. What a time for grief! I have spoken with the mom several times in the last couple days preparing for the luncheon and planning around the windy weather. I wish my brain didn't automatically turn on the "Hi how are you?" when I am on the phone. Really, am I asking a mother who has lost her two month old son how she is doing? Do I really want her to answer when I can hear that her voice is already raw from days of tears? How easy it is for me to get so distracted with so many other things until I am on the phone, and it isn't business as usual. Nobody knows for sure why the baby died, if it was sudden or drawn out; I heard it might have been from complication from the baby being sick when he received a series of shots at his last check-up or possibly SIDS. No matter what the reason, my heart broke open when I saw that little casket. I went to the graveside service in support of the family and representing the staff as Father couldn't be there. The casket sat there. Tiny and white. The little handles on the side. It looked more like a child's toy, appeared extraordinarily light as one man lifted it into place before we threw baby roses and dirt in the grave. The wind was pushing us over. Those huddled with their back to the wind had a better spot than the few of us facing into it, leaning so hard that we would have all landed on our noses if the wind just stopped. The grit and sand we cleaned out of our eyelashes and dusted from our cheeks were substantial and a little muddy in the corners of our eyes where they mingled with tears. I couldn't hear much of what the mother said, as the wind carried away her voice, but I did catch that he had just watched his first movie and he had laughed for the first time, though there are so many other firsts he will never have. She reminded us all to cherish what we have. There were pictures at the hall afterward, and he looked like his daddy. There were some great silly shots, lots of smiles and love. It's hard to concentrate on anything when I try to imagine the grief and pain such young people are trying to cope with - sometimes we have to have faith because nothing else makes sense. They created a fund at the local bank, and many have contributed to help the family. So many people prepared food for the luncheon. Being new to town and experiencing this for the first time, I can only say that the sadness and empathy I feel for these young parents is countered with gladness for the outpouring of support of strangers for these two young people. The Ladies Auxiliary of the local fire department said "yes" when I called for their help, as Chris instructed me. I don't even know who most of these women are, but they showed up and showed me how good hospitality can look. And though I wish I were numb to the sadness, I am glad to feel how generous the community is.

Getting in the spirit...

Today was a fantastic day for getting in the spirit of Advent and Christmas!

Because Thomas was coming in to Cimarron tonight, I took a ride with Marie to work, so Thomas and I could drive home together at the end of the evening.  I set my alarm extra early, and surprisingly, it wasn't snoozed for half an hour this morning.  (A real surprise because I stayed up too late finishing The Help.)

I dressed and readied myself for work, indulging in a pumpkin empanada for breakfast.  When I checked the clock, I knew I was early.  I told Marie I would meet her by the mailboxes at 7:05 am, so as not to delay her for her kindness.  The kitchen clock said 6:55 am (and it was likely a few minutes fast), but I am lousy at dawdling in the morning.  Not that I don't know how, but I will likely dawdle too long and then be late.  I decided I would just bundle up and head out.

It wasn't possible that I had missed her, and it was too chilly to stand and wait.  I enjoyed daybreak - the purple hues slowly fading into blue sky over the mountains.  And then I walked.  I just started trekking down the highway with my bags hung on my shoulder.  It felt good to get in a brisk walk like I used to during my days of walking through the neighborhood in Denver to work.  I was glad to have my shemagh wrapped around my cheeks and nose, my hat pulled down over my ears.  I made it all the way to Salado Creek Rd, down it, and about five yards up the Salas drive before sticking out my thumb and catching Marie as she drove out.  What a great way to start the day!

To end the day on a great note, Thomas picked me up from the office and took me to the middle school.  There we found a seat on the back of the bleachers next to our neighbors Art & Jo.  We enjoyed catching up and talking about life as the gym filled up with parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles.  Finally, the show was to start...the HeadStart through High School Christmas Performance.  We heard Andres on his horn and Maya on her recorder.  Marie was on her knees in leading her preK students through a few songs with clapping and jingle bells (the most entertaining for sure).  And Sara, maybe not so confident in the words of her class's songs, was looking around to see all the people watching her as she twirled in her little snowflake smock with the other kindersnowflakes.  All so precious!  I am thrilled for a new tradition and look forward to many more performances.

Not trying to steal the show, I am sure, was Daniel pushing Julie out of the gym when Santa showed up, eliciting a few giggles from the bleachers.  The race to be out the parking lot and not stuck behind a line of traffic was on!  Thomas and I were trapped behind the rows of people, but we made it out quickly enough.  We weren't worried about traffic so much as getting a table and service right quick at the St. James.  Not many trickled in after us from the show, but we got in and served right away.....phew...

Less than a week to ready ourselves for our trip....

I got me a fever...

No dance fever or Saturday Night Fever here...just the regular ol' ailment that keeps one in bed for hours and saps a person's strength.  Not much to post last week as I woke up with a fever on Thursday morning and was pretty out of it until Friday evening.  I think the slice of pizza I had from Thomas's plate brought me back to life - a little cheese and grease can cure anything our of the ordinary.

But I woke up Saturday feeling quite perky.  Thomas and I worked on a few little projects.  Then we headed over to see family.  I was recruited by Marie to make empanadas, and Julie, too.  We made a few dozen pumpkin empanadas...yummy...and it didn't take that long to make them with our little assembly line.

And then the highlight of the night was the annual Vigil ornament painting party.  It made for a great celebration of a belated birthday party for Dave and a day early birthday party for Alice.  Frito pies and beer and cake and ice cream...yes, in fact, we did have stinky gas at our house last night.  But we had so much fun painting ornaments.  The girls each painted at least half a dozen, and poor Sara was feeling quite teased I am sure, as there was much laughing about how all the paint and a dozen dirty brushes were collected on her little corner of the table (not to mention where all the paint ended up besides the ornaments).  Everyone painted at least three, as Thomas cracked down on mandatory family fun.  And indeed, it was a lot of fun!  If only every weekend could be like it...(I know, Daniel, you'd boycott...)

Nearly picture perfect....

Can you picture the United States Post Office logo? I had to look it up on the website. The one that came to mind might have been the previous logo, but all things considered, it still works. On my way in to work this morning, I passed the Miami Post Office as I do every morning. It is roughly the size of the mudroom we built on our house, attached to the home of the Postmistress. There is a mini-version of the blue mail box familiar to most city dwellers out front. And there is a tall flagpole with the stars and stripes flapping in the wind. This morning, perched high in the top of a tree next to the house was a golden eagle. I slowed down to look up at it - it was huge! Now I am no ornithologist, but it looked to me like a golden eagle, and that is what it will be until I am told otherwise.

Sausages...

Field Roast Grain Meat Company is awesome! 

When Thomas and I gathered all our friends and family together before our wedding, we had a delicious BBQ in Wildwood Park.  Thomas and my dad were responsible for the grocery shopping, and they found delicious fake sausages to go with all the fancy sausages they had for the meat eaters.  Field Roast Grain Meat Co. makes Mexican Chipotle, Smoked Apple Sage, and Italian Sausages.  I tried them all (not that night...) and found them delicious. 

Summer BBQs are popular around here, and while I do like black bean burgers and other fake burgers, sometimes it is nice to have variety.

Thomas and I found some of the Smoked Apple Sage sausages on our last trip through Denver at the beginning of October.  We bought all the Natural Grocers had - three packages.  I have eaten up one package, but have been feeling stingy in case I eat them all.  So on Thomas' trip to Santa Fe today, he found some and surprised me with a bag of several packages in all the flavors!  Woo woo!!

Now I have been especially skeptical of the whole fake meat scene.  I am not a big fan in general of making the same old meaty dishes with fake meat.  However, I do like seitan, one of the "grain meats" upon which Field Roast bases their products.  Anyway, I made cous cous last night for Thomas and I, and I chopped one sausage up into the vegetables that I sauteed, and it added a different texture and flavor.  The Mexican Chipotle ones are akin to chorizo, so I look forward to chopping one up in scrambled eggs with green chiles and potatoes.  I can add chipotle powder to the mix, but it isn't quite the same as adding a nugget of the flavor spread throughout.  Oh sure, I can justify my indulgence with all sorts of excuses....the truth is they are good!

And my husband is even better for such a thoughtful treat!

Road closed...

Yes, again, a post about the highway...maybe my last for a while... The shortest distance between two places is not through Miami, but the highway between Cimarron and Springer is officially closed in the middle. Evidently after the Ponil Bridge collapsed under the weight of a tractor trailer in May, it couldn't be repaired properly because of a nesting bird. The nest is empty, and work has resumed. Traffic has been re-routed right past our north fence line. I am not going to be a big whiner ongoing, but I do want to go on record as saying that all the extra traffic while I am driving at night is giving me a headache. There are some terribly non-courteous drivers who do not turn off their bright lights when they are approaching. It is so blinding when there is no other light around. It is awfully rude! Awfully rude!

And another thing, and this is something I have never experienced anywhere else, we all wave to each other when we pass people. It is sometimes nothing more than raising a finger off the steering wheel, but everyone acknowledges the other driver. Well, not the new traffic! The past few mornings I have gotten almost zero waves. So sad....

Bizarre...

Nobody would guess how we spent our Saturday morning: Thomas and I loaded up his truck with crafts and headed to the St. Joseph Holiday Bazaar. Thomas had been making wood carvings (with the help of Pop) leading up to the sale. I baked a double batch of pumpkin bread in mini loaves and knitted several hats - mostly kiddo sizes. Anyway, we set up our table and posted our signs. We walked through to see what else was being sold. Quite an assortment of crafts...knit, crocheted, and embroidered items; wood carvings; metal work; jewelry; and holiday decorations. Tom's mom was in the "white elephant" room - really more like a walk down the miscellaneous aisles at a thrift store. Thomas sat there for the better part of six hours. I had a little work to do right off the bat, and then I walked over to the market for some groceries for dinner. But I sat there for a good long while, too. It was nice to see some of our neighbors, also vendors. Tom's mom stopped by several times, and his dad came for lunch. Mostly I enjoyed the time we had together talking and teasing. It wasn't a great sale. Evidently there were a lot more vending tables than past years, and the turnout was a lot slimmer. We sold out of pumpkin bread, sold most of the ornaments, and a few of the carvings. None of the hats sold. We did okay all things considered, but learned some good lessons for the next time. Here is Tom sitting behind the table:

Getting busy...

How is it that a day might drag a little here or there, but then the last fifteen minutes of the day, there is suddenly all sorts of things to wrap up?  Ah well....

 

I knit a hat last night for the bazaar on Saturday, and if I am lucky, I can knit one tonight, too.  I watched Beaches with Bette Midler while I knit (yes, of course, Thomas was at work, not on the couch next to me).   Tonight, maybe Chicago.

 

I am excited that in less than three weeks Thomas and I will be in Portland.  There is a lot going on between now and then, but all in good time.  I am excited for two more birthday celebrations here - will help me not miss my brother's 30th and his son's 1st birthday in Portland in a week.. 

 

So back to knitting...